# been dehydrating, making beer, will be making wine & cider, and going to a bees wkshp



## mrs_jones (Nov 16, 2008)

Hi all, 

So I got the reminder in my email that I have not been on the site in awhile. So, here I am I made sure I keep my account active, and here I am today : )
What have I been up to - various different food things but I guess here is the most important point I would like to make at this time which I believe is important to all - the importance of picking the right spouse/partner when you are trying to achieve this lifestyle. I have seen articles and even workshops on this subject in publications about the liveaboard boat lifestyle too. People can say one thing but really not be on board with an idea, or not have the flexibility, endurance and patience to live full time in a new way, or it is not important to them to be self-sufficient and financially solvent if it means they give up their comforts such as a $4/day latte' habit or an expensive car pmt if it is putting or keeping them in debt. This can be an expensive and frustrating lesson to learn that may cost you years, $ and effort in the wrong relationship.

I am still an "urban homesteader" after I put ex through school for agriculture, he jumped ship, he was almost done with school, and keeping the promise that after I put him through school I could stay home (I have MS) obviously was freaking him out that he was going to have to man up and do what we agreed on. It was really hard for me to keep working for years on end when doctors kept telling me to cut back to part time. Note to all the ladies and really to all people in general out there - pick your spouse carefully, it can make or break your life. My 20's gone, what a waste of my time and energy. 2 years in ugly divorce where he tried to claim my inheritance as community property because he put maybe 5% toward the cost of an item I bought with my inheritance, and really 0% when you consider I was carrying the majority of the bills at the time while he was in school. Divorce was finalized 3 days ago - I managed to win it on my terms with no concessions to him, while going pro se (representing myself after my lawyer screwed me over - I have a claim in process with the Bar against him). Hope they rot (my ex, his family, my bad lawyer and his rude lawyer). Karma is a bitch and I hope they get theirs in this economy or otherwise. Those who are middle class or above have no excuse to not be prepared and end up on our taxpayer $ when there are those of us who are becoming self-sufficient on less to not depend on public coffers to bail us out. He was a completely irresponsible boy with a sense that women are supposed to work their @ss off to take care of him, work 2 jobs while raising kids while men sit on couch and drink beer, something he learned from his mommy and never grew out of. If you are trying to build your self-sufficent property and program, a bad spouse can hinder everything - wasting money, buying toys, etc instead of sticking to the plan. I have a friend who has emphasized this to me, and also that attitude is more important than experience - her first partner had country skills, but no ability to be flexible and deal with stressful or unforseen situations - her second partner was a "city boy" but learned well how to roll with the punches and learn many new skills with patience and curiosity. He is the one that lasted even in an environment totally alien to him at first and is now enjoying the self sufficient lifestyle. He has no problem being the breadwinner while she works on the homestead. This is a very smart lady who math tutors part time and has wired and rewired their house several times after doing all the calculations, etc for maximum efficiency in their off grid setup. She also keeps goats, poultry, does a lot of canning, put a greenhouse together, etc. The division of labor is equitable and her work that she does, while the $ she is bringing in is minimal, is respected by her spouse. I don't care which spouse brings in cash, or both, or neither, but work is work and needs to be respected as such. I knew my current partner was a keeper when I saw all the survival, DIY winemaking, etc. and small business mgmt books on his bookshelf. He taught me to make beer a few weeks ago and we are doing cider next after picking a pear tree we were given access to by our city's "cityfruit" program (people with trees with more fruit than they can use offer it to others who want to u-pick). He also wants to do u-pick of other things sometime too. And he is as into freecycling as I am and we respect each other's thrift, while my ex thought it was weird and would rather go blow money at walmart (I now see clearly he was nothing but a walmart *******, instead of a self-sufficient country person like he said).

Anyway - currently I am doing a 3 month housesit for someone with a raised bed veggie garden, an apple tree that is making nice fruit, a covered carport and porch to do messy projects, and the place to myself so no one can tell me not to make a mess or that it won't work! ; ) I am seeing endangered birds right on the property, neighbors keep chickens, and there are coyotes around. There is a ravine right next to this that was too step to build on so this is where the wildlife is coming from. So it's a mini rural pocket in the suburbs. My mom is finally coming around to more farm skills after helping to get a neighborhood organic p-patch going in her area and eating string beans, etc from her garden patch each time she walks her dog there every day. She invited me to a "bees, chickens and tomatoes" workshop tomorrow night. They know I want to keep bees and may allow me to keep a hive on their property (yard in suburbs). Funny how I can tell them something but it takes hearing it from "the Man" or something "official" like an "organization" before they are willing to try it. Their house is close enough to their p-patch I am sure the bees would go over there and back daily during flowering season (I have heard that bees will not harvest anything from within 50 feet of their own hive - don't know if this is true but I guess I will learn!) Was offered a 6 month housesit for some people with chickens who are doing overseas nonprofit work, had to turn it down because I had the first housesit set up already, but they invited me to come out and learn chicken butchering from start to finish next week, which I accepted because I need to learn it. I have plucked and helped clean wild turkeys a couple times but can I do the chopping - if not then I will just do eggs in the future.
By December or January I hope to have my credit score to 650 to get a boat loan, only a few points to go to get there, my debt is very minimal. Plan to live on a 25-30 ft sailboat, off grid, solar panel, wind is free, I am not in a big fat hurry and will only use motor to get in and out of harbor until I learn to do it wind-only. Today I got my new low-cost laptop hooked up to my cell phone for wireless internet connection, where I will be I should not be out of range, if it gets to where I am more remote from service I can get satellite internet and phone if necessary. Boat gives me access to the many islands not far from Seattle in the Puget Sound and Straits between here and Canada. Hope to get a couple acres on an island to grow food and put small house, and an acre of mudflat to dig clams, mussels and even geoduck (which sells for $50/lb for sushi). An island with no ferry service, water grid or electric grid so it does not become crowded and my neighbors will likely be self-sufficient types. If I can't get a boat loan, then I will see about a trailer rental out in the boonies with a yard where I can do projects and grow food. I have my 4wd truck for this reason. I have met some people here who are very into this, and have learned that the people who say "wow that's cool" are not the same people who say they are saving for off grid property and would I like to come over to make cheese. It's natural for me to think that everyone would have this as a goal as their country property for their retirement but I can't assume that and am learning that listening and watching people's actions are a better gauge of their personality and ethics (do they save, do they live within means, do they minimize consumption, do they have or intend to get solar setup, etc).


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## Meerkat (May 31, 2011)

Welcome back,glad you are better.


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