# Dealing with "Them"



## dnsnthegrdn (Jun 29, 2011)

I'm sure there are a lot of you out there that have the same issue. I'm prepping and my sister and her family and my husband and my best freinds both say that when shtf they are coming to our place. They know that we know how to garden and hunt, we have guns and know how to use them. They know that we would be able to take care of ourselves and they are coming our way.

Now, joining up with family and friends is the best option. Except THEY aren't stocking up on anything! My best friend thought she was doing good when she bought 12 packs of veggies from Sam's Club (not for storage just for use). My sister and her husband have decided that they are going to invest in a water filter and that would be thier contribution when they head our way. Nice thought, but we have water sources available to us and we know ways to make the water usable. We have a creek and an old well on the property. 

My hubby told me to stop buying so much extra food and I told him we only have about a months worth of food and that's just for us. Then I told him about our friends and family planning on coming to us if shtf. It would last no time. This was news to him and he said that it was selfish of them and I agreed. I've even told these individuals it was selfish when I've had a couple beers to many. I actually told my best friend once "Don't make me drive you off with a gun." Which I immediatley took back, but.....

It's not like we can drive them away. Anyone else have this problem?


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## Von Helman (Oct 31, 2009)

just tell them all you have a very well stocked BOL and give them directions to meet up with you if SHTF but that you will not be using any communications at the time so they better keep the directions in their mind... Oh sorry wrong directions.. lol


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## partdeux (Aug 3, 2011)

dnsnthegrdn said:


> It's not like we can drive them away. Anyone else have this problem?


you're talking WAY TOO MUCH


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## Magus (Dec 1, 2008)

Two options: tell them to pitch in for the food or bring their own.

Tell them your immediate family comes first, no free rides.


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## kilagal (Nov 8, 2011)

We went to visit my db and sil a few years ago. We got to the house and db let us in but had to leave to take a kid to the dentist. So my dh said why didn't I just cook dinner since my sil was still at work. Ok I opened the cabinet to get something too cook. There was one small can of tomato sauce and one can of cat food. I kind of freeked out. And not really even enough stuff in the fridge to make a sandwich. Then the phone rang and it was my sil calling from work. Wanted to know what we wanted on pizza. She was getting take out for dinner. The next day she was off work and we went grocery shopping. I asked her about it she said she shopped almost every night she would call my db and ask what he wanted for dinner and then stop at the store on the way home and buy it. It freeked me out for sure.
The last time my brother was here was 3 years ago. He made the comment that he could never live with me. Said he was afraid I would have him working in the garden or cleaning critter pens. I assured him I would. He said he would go stay with his wifes family then. I just smiled.................


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## JayJay (Nov 23, 2010)

dnsnthegrdn said:


> I'm sure there are a lot of you out there that have the same issue. I'm prepping and my sister and her family and my husband and my best freinds both say that when shtf they are coming to our place. They know that we know how to garden and hunt, we have guns and know how to use them. They know that we would be able to take care of ourselves and they are coming our way.
> 
> Now, joining up with family and friends is the best option. Except THEY aren't stocking up on anything! My best friend thought she was doing good when she bought 12 packs of veggies from Sam's Club (not for storage just for use). My sister and her husband have decided that they are going to invest in a water filter and that would be thier contribution when they head our way. Nice thought, but we have water sources available to us and we know ways to make the water usable. We have a creek and an old well on the property.
> 
> ...


Hey, you got me beat...my neighbor thinks she's prepped with a few boxes of oatmeal...and a case of bottled water.
I'm Russellville by the way...Hello.:beercheer:


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## chris88idaho (Apr 30, 2012)

Get a Uhaul truck and drive to the opposite side of the country. I did, solved all sorts of issues!


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## artman556 (May 2, 2012)

Tell them to bring there own food


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## 101airborne (Jan 29, 2010)

Have to agree with partduex and mangus. First off OPSEC is key do not tell people what you've got or are doing. By doing so you'll end up like you obviously have, keep quiet. You say your prepping for_______________________. How long are you doing so for? A week? Two? three months? Six? A year? What you need to keep in mind is you can't carry everyone. Extra "bodies" mean a drain on your familys future well being. As for me can I run off or "drive away" so called friend or free loading relatives in a shtf situation? Da** right I can and WILL! They all know it also. I've had a couple friends say that if TSHTF they are coming to my house. I made it quite plain that if they do they had better have their own supplies bacause I ain't sharing ours. One EX-friend asked what would I do if they did without supplies? I bluntly told her that I'd make sure she got buried! While that may sound bad, when it comes to my familys welfare I'm a 110% died in the wool hard a$$ bastard,


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## UncleJoe (Jan 11, 2009)

Magus said:


> Two options: tell them to pitch in for the food or bring their own.
> 
> Tell them your immediate family comes first, no free rides.


Or... tell them they can buy their way in.

$10,000 down and $5,000 a year until TSHTF.

That should give you enough money to prepare for them as well.


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## BlueShoe (Aug 7, 2010)

UncleJoe said:


> Or... tell them they can buy their way in.
> 
> $10,000 down and $5,000 a year until TSHTF.
> 
> That should give you enough money to prepare for them as well.


...nobody rides for free.


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## FatTire (Mar 20, 2012)

at the risk of sounding like a liberal (ok, its not a risk, im a liberal) ill play a bit of devils advocate here. its been my experience that people behave a lot differently under real stress, and theres really no way predict how they will actualy behave. you cant expect everyone to embrace a prepper/survivalist lifestyle when they can still stop and get a road beer, see which shoes are popular this season, and maybe late one night after apple-tini's check out ready.gov... 

i like to look at peoples skill sets. you can learn something from really anyone, even that mouthy bro in law you cant stand. and when it comes to real survival, we need to be leaders. people who dont prep and talk of leaching off you when shtf, act like they wont work, well, they really will when it comes down to it. and they will surprise you with what they actualy can bring to the table when the situation gets tense. 

judge slowly, reward generously, and dont be afraid to motivate.


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## Nadja (Jan 12, 2011)

IF you should slip and let someone see your preps, then just say you got it because a store in another town was haveing a going out of bus sale. But push come to shove and something does happen, that you and yours are coming to their place.


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## pixieduster (Mar 28, 2012)

How about, Well In Laws, I have a mental illness. I have to have 100 of everything or have a nervous breakdown. If anyone comes near them, I may become homicidal, at least that's what my doctor says.


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## mosquitomountainman (Jan 25, 2010)

I like Uncle Joe's idea best ... but, moochers, being moochers they'll probably still show up on your doorstep expecting you to support them.

First, OpSec is the best option but too late for you. In that case you might purchase some sacks of livestock feed like wheat and corn. Get a cheap grain grinder and some cook books using just corn and wheat for food. Print up a couple of handouts for things like hoe-bread (mostly corn meal and water mixed and cooked on a garden hoe) and hard tack (similar but made with wheat). Proudly show them your "food stocks" and the recipes while mentioning that people used to survive on far less than this. Also point out that so many people have stated that they are coming to your house if TSHTF that you've decided the livestock feed is the best option due to cost/affordability. (Add some dog food to your stocks as well just in case you run low on corn and wheat.)

Tell them that with that many people you'll probably have to put them up "dorm" style in tents in the yard so it will be one for the women, one for the men and one for the kids. If they can bring their camper it would be great because they could put some of the people up in it instead of tents. Of course if TS has HTF there'll be no television or internet access since there'll be no electricity so they should bring reading material in case they have time left over after their work-day. Be enthusiastic about all the help you'll have for things like digging, gardening, cutting wood, foraging, etc. and don't forget to point out that toilet paper will be rationed and they'll have to dig/use an outhouse.

Don't forget to mention that the gas will be siphoned out of their fuel tanks to use in the dual-fuel gas lanterns and stoves they'll be using for light and cooking and that their personal possessions will be limited to one suitcase each. Anything beyond that will be shared with those who didn't have time to pack their own stuff. 

Above all be enthusiastic that you've got a plan to help them and the other 50 or so people who've said they were coming there if TSHTF. Oh, and don't let them forget their sleeping bags and cots because you'll be short on these and they might have to share.


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## dnsnthegrdn (Jun 29, 2011)

The only reason they even know is because I've tried to talk them into prepping themselves. I'm definately not going around telling everybody.

Fat Tire - that is the one thing that makes me feel better. My brother in law is built like an ox so he would definately be good man power, plus he welds for a living bringing that skill. My hubby and his best friend are avid hunters and fishers. So it's nice to think of having another person there to help with that. We live on the edge of woods so....

As for the two women those biddies are going to learn how to do some "real" gardening and preserving. I'm definately going to put them to work. They will learn real quick that it's not going to be a free ride. 

I think we could form a pretty good group.

I guess I do need to talk to them more sternly about bringing along supplies when they come. As for buying thier way in, eh, money may be worthless. Yeah, I'm going to have to tell them to put up or shut up I guess. Just so they will take more thought into what they are going to bring to the table.

Pixieduster-I am crazy. That would probably work very well. Ha ha ha!:congrat:


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## dnsnthegrdn (Jun 29, 2011)

mosquitomountainman said:


> I like Uncle Joe's idea best ... but, moochers, being moochers they'll probably still show up on your doorstep expecting you to support them.
> 
> First, OpSec is the best option but too late for you. In that case you might purchase some sacks of livestock feed like wheat and corn. Get a cheap grain grinder and some cook books using just corn and wheat for food. Print up a couple of handouts for things like hoe-bread (mostly corn meal and water mixed and cooked on a garden hoe) and hard tack (similar but made with wheat). Proudly show them your "food stocks" and the recipes while mentioning that people used to survive on far less than this. Also point out that so many people have stated that they are coming to your house if TSHTF that you've decided the livestock feed is the best option due to cost/affordability. (Add some dog food to your stocks as well just in case you run low on corn and wheat.)
> 
> ...


Luckily it's only the two friends (they are married to each other), and my sister and her family. I don't have a hoard coming. I'm not blabbing to everyone I meet about my prepping. When we moved, I totally forgot about the fact that my son's bed was completely filled with food underneath. We had help moving and needless to say the people were shocked to see all the food. I just told them I take advantage of sales, and ran out of space to store the stuff I'd canned. That seemed to work. With these few that are coming telling them they would have to live in a tent wouldn't bother them a bit, we all love to camp!


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## goatlady (Nov 7, 2011)

"As for the two women those biddies are going to learn how to do some "real" gardening and preserving. I'm definately going to put them to work. They will learn real quick that it's not going to be a free ride." 

And what is your plan when they flat out refuse? You are totally endangering YOUR family's lives, betting they will shape up and get with the program AFTER they feel they are safe and fed just because you did let them in your saFety zone. You'd best get the work details and expectations worked out NOW and clarified NOW while they still have a chance to maKe the necessary changes at their choice rather than being forced to make a change.


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## mosquitomountainman (Jan 25, 2010)

dnsnthegrdn said:


> Luckily it's only the two friends (they are married to each other), and my sister and her family. I don't have a hoard coming. I'm not blabbing to everyone I meet about my prepping. When we moved, I totally forgot about the fact that my son's bed was completely filled with food underneath. We had help moving and needless to say the people were shocked to see all the food. I just told them I take advantage of sales, and ran out of space to store the stuff I'd canned. That seemed to work. With these few that are coming telling them they would have to live in a tent wouldn't bother them a bit, we all love to camp!


I'd let them think you had a bunch of folks coming whether you were or not. Camping is what you do on weekends. Living full time in a tent is usually a miserable experience if you don't know what you're doing. You can't just throw the dishes and dirty clothes into a pile expecting to take care of them when you get home ... the tent IS home.

Anyway, good luck.

Steve


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## mojo4 (Feb 19, 2012)

Well its simple, I told my parents that if the choice came to feeding my kids or them that I would be sure to bury them deep enough so the dog won't dig em up. And then I told them would they wanna eat and starve the grandkids?? So they bought hundreds of pounds of grub!! Same for my brother and his 4 kids. And my SIL and her 3 daughters. Now my whole family is prepping cause nobody wants to starve out a sweet baby!! Thank God for my youngun, she's gotten everyones ass in gear!! Yep, got em all buying the 4 B's, beans, bullets, band aids and booze!! It seriously is amazing how the protective instincts kick in!!


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## WatchUr6 (May 18, 2012)

I don't have to worry about any freeloaders showing up. My brother use to be one of them. After explaining to him what would happen to the uninvited, he has begun preparing. Now my father on the other hand thinks I'm crazy. I'm still working on trying to convince him to have enough food and water for several months. Hopefully he comes around, because he does not live in the best neighborhood. One good thing is that he like guns and has a lot of them. There are only a handful of people that know what I have, and I trust them. I do not talk to anyone else about what I do. I don't want a mob showing up, cause I'd rather use my ammo to fill the pot then the fight off the unprepared.


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## neil-v1 (Jan 22, 2010)

I also do not trust anyone and my rule is for everyone else to just stay away. I just do not see a way to be able to help others who did not prepare and keep them from coming back for more after whatever little bit I could give them is gone. And when they do come back, will they have a gun and be prepared to TAKE when they know it's possible to hear the word NO when they ask a second time?


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## Magus (Dec 1, 2008)

Good thoughts! :congrat:


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## weedygarden (Apr 27, 2011)

*Some thoughts*

I have made some simple statements to some friends and family.

I have told them that the Red Cross has recommended that we all have 2 weeks worth of preparations. http://www.redcross.org/www-files/Documents/pdf/Preparedness/checklists/Be_Red_Cross_Ready.pdf

Since this is a pdf, it is easily printable to hand out to someone *who may show interest*. But if not to handout to THEM, you can quote it as the Red Cross recommendations. This seems less crazy to some than what we might think. After someone can get the two week recommendation together, more seems easier, to me.

When there is some disaster somewhere (Fukishima, tornadoes, flooding), it is a time that I just throw some thoughts out, such as, "How would anyone prepare for such a thing?"

I participated in a CERT training and it was interesting to me that THEY asked about it. Again, it is a national program, and seems less likely to be crazy than if it was just coming from me.

One more idea: If you have family members who have heard it and are in denial and going to come and ride on your back, use the typical birthday and Christmas gifts as opportunities to purchase some preps that they might not necessarily take off and use before THE EVENT or that could still help during SHTF time. Some ideas might be some dehydrated vegetables or fruits, flashlights, two way radios, knives, sleeping bags, bug out bag. In some instances where you know they are coming your way, you can even let them know that you will keep it for them until SHTF time.


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## SimpleJoys (Apr 28, 2012)

I tried to talk to my brother, a cop, about preparing for any sort of disaster, including a bad ice storm that took out power for a couple of weeks. He said, "It's one thing to have a prepared mindset, but actually doing something about it is crazy." I'm still trying to wrap my head around that.


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## d_saum (Jan 17, 2012)

mojo4 said:


> Well its simple, I told my *parents* that if the choice came to feeding my kids or them that I would be sure to *bury them deep enough so the dog won't dig em up*. And then I told them would they wanna eat and starve the grandkids?? So they bought hundreds of pounds of grub!! Same for my brother and his 4 kids. And my SIL and her 3 daughters. Now my whole family is prepping cause nobody wants to starve out a sweet baby!! Thank God for my youngun, she's gotten everyones ass in gear!! Yep, got em all buying the 4 B's, beans, bullets, band aids and booze!! It seriously is amazing how the protective instincts kick in!!


Dude.. seriously... wtf is wrong with you? You're talking about BURYING your parents? YOUR PARENTS? I don't know how they treated you growing up but... my parents raised me right and I would DO ANYTHING for my mother (my father passed away years ago). So yeah.. my preps include enough to cover the woman who raised me and made me the person I am today. You should be ******* ashamed of yourself.. If you don't have the means to prep for them, I'd understand trying to get your point across about getting them to prep... but not the way you went about it. For Christs sake man..

(sorry, but I'm really close to my family and just cannot fathom what he's implying).


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## Magus (Dec 1, 2008)

I can.

Tough love there bud, not my choice of words, but you probably saved their lives!


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## FatTire (Mar 20, 2012)

d_saum said:


> Dude.. seriously... wtf is wrong with you? You're talking about BURYING your parents? YOUR PARENTS? I don't know how they treated you growing up but... my parents raised me right and I would DO ANYTHING for my mother (my father passed away years ago). So yeah.. my preps include enough to cover the woman who raised me and made me the person I am today. You should be ******* ashamed of yourself.. If you don't have the means to prep for them, I'd understand trying to get your point across about getting them to prep... but not the way you went about it. For Christs sake man..
> 
> (sorry, but I'm really close to my family and just cannot fathom what he's implying).


I can understand. The last time I saw my mother I had to kick her out of my house cause I caught her shooting up in the bathroom. It's nice you have a good family, but not everyone does.


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## WatchUr6 (May 18, 2012)

D_saum. Try not to take mojo4 literally. I know him and he is a good guy. The point he was trying to get across was that no one is going to take food away from his kids. I agree with him. My four kids come before me and my wife. So it is easy to place them before anyone else, which includes all other family members. Would I turn my own father way? Yes I would if he had nothing to contribute. There is nothing that I wouldn't do to make sure my kids don't starve. I'm still in the process of convincing my father to prepare. My next conversation with him might include "Don't show up to my house and expect me to let you in." With some people it takes a different form of persuasion.


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## d_saum (Jan 17, 2012)

WatchUr6 said:


> D_saum. Try not to take mojo4 literally. I know him and he is a good guy. The point he was trying to get across was that no one is going to take food away from his kids. I agree with him. My four kids come before me and my wife. So it is easy to place them before anyone else, which includes all other family members. Would I turn my own father way? Yes I would if he had nothing to contribute. There is nothing that I wouldn't do to make sure my kids don't starve. I'm still in the process of convincing my father to prepare. My next conversation with him might include "Don't show up to my house and expect me to let you in." With some people it takes a different form of persuasion.


I hear ya... I just.. I could never say anything like that to my family. Yes.. I get it.. kids come first.. but to me, because I'm so close with my family, it's just "extra preps" for the family every time I go shopping. And here lately, I've actually gotten my mother and my aunt to buy a little extra when they go shopping.. they are on the cusp of becoming actual "preppers". Also, they used to can stuff when they were younger so they are looking into getting back into that. All without threats of being buried.. It makes my skin crawl to even think about it.. anyways.. moving on.. lol.


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## Djdog (Oct 8, 2011)

*I like this approach...*

I'm 62 years old and have been a prepper since I joined the cub scouts when i was 8 years old. I'm now a "grandpa" and father of 3 grown adult women with families.... For at least the past 3 years I have dropped hints as well as flat out statements that "things" are going to get prettttyyyyy strange and down right ugly before too long. They just don't get it. Frankly, if I was as young and hopeful as they were maybe i would be ignoring all the things going down about me, too, but i don't think so. Anyway, there is a link from survival blog that I saved for my own entertainment as I'd never send it to the kids as I'm just too damn willing to help until it hurts but you'll get a kick out of it. Anyway it is called, "Welcome to the promised land." The second one is one I sent to the kids about what happens to those who do not prepare.... hope it works but don't hold your breath...

http://www.survivalblog.com/2010/10/welcome_to_the_promised_land_b.html

http://www.shtfplan.com/emergency-preparedness/how-horrific-will-it-be-for-the-non-prepper_05122012


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## dnsnthegrdn (Jun 29, 2011)

Thanks for all the thoughts. I've definately been talking to my sister. I brought up the idea of sending money every month. I told her just to send whatever she could. She can even send me a list of what she would like me to buy with it. Anything is better than nothing. I'm going to print out The Promise Land and give to my sister and my friend.


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## kappydell (Nov 27, 2011)

This was posted on the Mrs Survival forum - the best things I've seen so far to discourage slackers:

In the Event of a Disaster, the Following is Provided So You Will Know What is Expected of You Should You Decide to Come to My House 

YOU WILL NEED TO BRING:

1. CLOTHING - Nothing fancy - just good, sturdy, easy care clothes. We will probably have to wash by hand and dry on a line, so plan accordingly. There will be no dry cleaning available. Also, bring rain gear.

2. PLAIN BLEACH AND OTHER CLEANERS - Plain bleach will be used in water purification as well as general cleaning. More people mean more cleaning to keep a healthy environment.

3. FOOD - No explanation needed. Bring all that you have or can bring.

4. BEDDING OR SLEEPING BAG - I have floor space - not bed space.

5. WEAPONS, AMMO, FISHING GEAR - There will come a time when we will have to hunt and fish for our food. Weapons and ammo will be locked up for safety.

6. PRESCRIPTION MEDICINE(S), FIRST AID SUPPLIES - You will need your medicines even in the aftermath of a disaster. Be sure to bring plenty because it may be a long time before you get more. Bring all first aid supplies even if it is just a box of band aids.

7. PAPER TOWELS, TOILET PAPER, TRASH BAGS - No explanation needed.

8. SOAP, SHAMPOO, TOOTHPASTE, ETC. - You will need to keep yourself clean.

9. BOARD GAMES, CARDS, A BOOK OR TWO - These will be used during a little downtime before bed or during any other free time that may come available. There may not be any electricity, so don't plan on just watching movies or using a computer.

10. ANYTHING ELSE YOU CAN THINK OF TO HELP MAKE LIFE AFTER [A] DISASTER A LITTLE MORE ENJOYABLE.

PLEASE NOTE: EVERYTHING EXCEPT CLOTHING, BEDDING AND PRESCRIPTIONS WILL GO INTO HOUSE STORES FOR EVERYONE'S USE.

YOU WILL BE EXPECTED TO WORK FOR THE HOUSE EACH DAY. THE FOLLOWING LIST IS TO GIVE YOU AN IDEA OF WHAT WILL BE EXPECTED OF EACH PERSON. THE WORK INVOLVED WILL DEPEND ON THE NEEDS OF THE HOUSE.

1. DAILY CHORES - These will include, but not be limited to, cooking the meals and cleaning up afterward, washing clothes and hanging out to dry, sweeping the floors, cleaning the bathrooms.

2. HUNTING AND FISHING, AS NEEDED - This will also include cleaning the kill or catch, filleting as needed, and preparing for cooking. The hides will also have to be scraped, salted, and stretched to tan. Sewn together, even small hides can be used to make clothes.

3. GARDENING, AS SEASON ALLOWS - This will include, but not be limited to, starting seeds inside in late winter, tilling ground, planting outside, weeding, watering, and harvesting. We will can or dry any extra vegetables should the crop be good.

4. HAUL WATER AND PURIFY IT - The nearest lake is a long way off. The water will need to be purified before it can be used.

5. CHOP OR GATHER FIREWOOD - When the propane runs out, or to supplement it to make it last longer, we'll cook outside on an open fire, weather permitting. We will have to heat our water this way for washing dishes, general cleaning, bathing, etc.

AND ANY OTHER TASK REQUIRED TO HELP THE HOUSE SURVIVE.

REMEMBER - NO WORK - NO EAT - NO EXCEPTIONS!!

THIS IS SURVIVAL - NOT CLUB MED!"


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## weedygarden (Apr 27, 2011)

*?*



SimpleJoys said:


> I tried to talk to my brother, a cop, about preparing for any sort of disaster, including a bad ice storm that took out power for a couple of weeks. He said, "It's one thing to have a prepared mindset, but actually doing something about it is crazy." I'm still trying to wrap my head around that.


My grandmother would have said, "That is the pot calling the kettle black."


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## lefty (Sep 29, 2011)

We moved back to fl to be close to family and the back up bol. Since then I have had to deal with the fact that my inlaws are coming here. MY fil, mil and bil no problem they have skills, weapons tools etc. If my sil shows up well they think a weel stocked pantry has a box and a half of corn flakes and 3 cans of soup, do not believe in guns, etc. I know I will have to take them in so I have just accepted it. I also think some of my scouts are going to show up. The other meeting we had one of them (they are 9) asked me if I have ever seen the show doomsday preppers I say yes ( I push preparedness) and he asks if he can come to my house if things get bad he says my mom is not prepared if even the lights go out for a an hour. so add at least one scout and his mom.


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## goshengirl (Dec 18, 2010)

kappydell, I love that! Thanks for posting - I'm definitely borrowing it!


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## partdeux (Aug 3, 2011)

Lefty,

your generosity, while admirable, is likely to not work well. In general, people of that mind set will not be willing to work hard and produce enough to help support the clan.


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## bahramthered (Mar 10, 2012)

I'm lucky, I bad things happen only one person knows I've started prepping. My girlfriend. Course she'd bring her 4 year old and probally her mom. Kenny's cool but I sometimes wonder if he's quite right, the mom... Might be problems.


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## lefty (Sep 29, 2011)

partdeux said:


> Lefty,
> 
> your generosity, while admirable, is likely to not work well. In general, people of that mind set will not be willing to work hard and produce enough to help support the clan.


my wifes family will work hard and they have skills and supplies not to worried , but I have always told my scouts they can always come to me if they need help, adn I work hard thrying to teach them self reliance preparedness etc. If they show up and need my help I will gove it, as for any moms in tow, I believe it would only be the scouts with no dad around that would show up. Mom will work if that means I have to ride her until she gets it so be it. I think most of them are just so overwhelmed that it is all they can do to stay afloat (from my observations) taking care of a kid by themselves. I think that if they had people around if you give them tasks and set the standard they will work.


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## lefty (Sep 29, 2011)

bahramthered said:


> I'm lucky, I bad things happen only one person knows I've started prepping. My girlfriend. Course she'd bring her 4 year old and probally her mom. Kenny's cool but I sometimes wonder if he's quite right, the mom... Might be problems.


good luck but just remeber they are a package deal.


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## neldarez (Apr 10, 2011)

Djdog said:


> I'm 62 years old and have been a prepper since I joined the cub scouts when i was 8 years old. I'm now a "grandpa" and father of 3 grown adult women with families.... For at least the past 3 years I have dropped hints as well as flat out statements that "things" are going to get prettttyyyyy strange and down right ugly before too long. They just don't get it. Frankly, if I was as young and hopeful as they were maybe i would be ignoring all the things going down about me, too, but i don't think so. Anyway, there is a link from survival blog that I saved for my own entertainment as I'd never send it to the kids as I'm just too damn willing to help until it hurts but you'll get a kick out of it. Anyway it is called, "Welcome to the promised land." The second one is one I sent to the kids about what happens to those who do not prepare.... hope it works but don't hold your breath...
> 
> http://www.survivalblog.com/2010/10/welcome_to_the_promised_land_b.html
> 
> http://www.shtfplan.com/emergency-preparedness/how-horrific-will-it-be-for-the-non-prepper_05122012


thank you, I printed out the promised land, that is great


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## mojo4 (Feb 19, 2012)

Wow Dsaum, guess I got your goat with my post!! I would not seriously kill my parents, I guess my joke didn't translate from my brain to keyboard!! But seriously, I did tell my family that I wouldn't put my kids to bed hungry so they could eat. I carefully explained that my kids are just babies and not old enough to prep and be ready but they were. Its important that adults make smart adult choices so kids don't pay the price like they usually end up doing. Kids and pets are the only true victims!


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## BillS (May 30, 2011)

We only have enough food for ourselves and the people we've INVITED. Nobody else will be let in the door or be given anything. We don't have a garden. We don't have a way to support any other people. We're not opening the door for anyone. People trying to break in will be met with deadly force. No exceptions. My and my family will not starve because I was too gutless to turn people away.


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## Possumfam (Apr 19, 2011)

Hmmmm...I couldn't get the link to work for me. Tried several times. With all the good reviews, I would've loved to have read the "Promised Land" post.


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## lazydaisy67 (Nov 24, 2011)

Frankly, my brothers would add some very valuable skills, but we live 3 hours away and they'd NEVER lower themselves to live on our "shabby" farm. That's fine with me cause I'd have a hard time dealing with them anyway although their skills as mechanics and wood workers sure would be nice. Hubby's side of the family has one brother who would prove helpful because of hunting skills and guns and ammo, but the other ones would be turned away. 
Everybody is going to be faced with making some difficult decisions. Deadbeats who want food without working for it will have to go, literally not figuratively.


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## Beaniemaster2 (May 22, 2012)

I think most of us are dealing with that scenario in one way or another, I know I am. How do we get them to prepare??? I was so happy so see those posts djdog, thank you so much, will try passing them on, can't hurt! I did give my copy of 'One Second After' to a neighbor to read and that did so much more than the little lectures I've been giving her for 3 yrs! 

I do have one prepping friend who still lives in Detroit who plans to come down to us if SHTF, she will bring a van full of supplies with her so that is no problem but last year when I approached her about buying a small trailer for here (she really likes her privacy and we were getting one for our son) she said no, I told her she was still very welcome but she might end up out in the barn then cause I can only prepare for the kids coming!!!

My hubby's kids (one in Jacksonville and one in Atlanta) said the would go to their mother's in Atlanta, problem is, their mother has nothing!!! What the heck are they thinking??? Actually, I hope they don't come, the women are prima donnas and it would be bad with them, geeeeeeeeze


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## lilmama (Nov 13, 2010)

It's not too bad with my family and inlaws. They either have gardens or hunt if not both and everyone has at least a couple of guns. My husband on the other hand is another matter. He knows but has no motivation to help me prepare. We sucked our pantry dry when he was laid off a few years back and he still doesn't see that the reason we didn't starve was because of that.


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## FutureFriendly (Jun 4, 2012)

lilmama said:


> It's not too bad with my family and inlaws. They either have gardens or hunt if not both and everyone has at least a couple of guns. My husband on the other hand is another matter. He knows but has no motivation to help me prepare. We sucked our pantry dry when he was laid off a few years back and he still doesn't see that the reason we didn't starve was because of that.


Best wishes, it's hard trying to stock up when unemployed, over-employed or underemployed. Love your life, self, husband, children and extended family. Love is not a free ride, it seems to grow with clear dialogue and boundaries. Try to live each day as if it might be the last but, think about what you would like your future to look like. I try to focus on small measurable things I can do each day to try and get to my goals.

Try not to show anyone what you have saved for you and your immediate family, it might only make you a bit paranoid after but, that alone is not nice. Take a test run with your group. I thought my mother and my man would get along, they try but, they couldn't live under the same roof. Find out the dynamics before you have to, so you can have greater understanding of what to expect and what will be asked of you. That's part of what I'd like to do and it is not easy.


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## TheLazyL (Jun 5, 2012)

partdeux said:


> you're talking WAY TOO MUCH


Agreed!

You tell your sibling what you're preparing for.
Sibling tells their close friend.
Friend tells spouse.
Spouse tells the bar buddies.

Bar Buddies and their families with all the above show up at your place with 6 pint bottles of water and 1/2 gallon of gasoline and you wonder what should you do?


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## BillS (May 30, 2011)

TheLazyL said:


> Agreed!
> 
> You tell your sibling what you're preparing for.
> Sibling tells their close friend.
> ...


You have an obligation to tell your loved ones to prepare. As I've said earlier, after it hits the fan I'm not opening the door for anyone. And anyone trying to break in will be met with deadly force.


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## ONEOLDCHIEF (Jan 5, 2012)

I have dropped hints to some in my family about prepping, buying extra ammo while prices are still down, asking them what they would do if the economy completely tanks as some have predicted. I mentioned that we had some supplies in sorage in case of a Hurricane, but for the most part they think we are on the verge of being insane.... I do not have to worry about them showing up at all at our door, my family owns a great BOL and they will hold up there, but the down side is we will not be able to go there either, 5 1/2 hours away. Will not endanger my family to get there...

Keep working on your family, show them pictures/videos of what is happening in Europe, maybe just maybe they will change their mindset...

Good luck with that...


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## md1911 (Feb 9, 2012)

I have the same concerns as you guys. My solution is the family members that think like I do allready are preparing and know some of what I have and where its at. I never reveal everything to any one person. And nobody knows everything. Keep a little ace in the hole. My friends and family that don't prepare I encorage them to. But they know their not welcome at my door if they don't have things to contribute. Life is hard and mother nature is a cruel task master. I will care for children but adults are on their own. Cruel you might say. I can't care for everyone and if your a grown man or woman and arnt prepared and have nothing of value to add then life sucks I will have no leeaches.............
Its time people grow up and remember your an adult and you are responsible for your own actions.


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## surviving (Jun 5, 2012)

Our plan -- for ANYONE who comes to us hungry after TSHTF -- is to give them a meal and send them on their way with instructions not to come back.

Peace,
Sheila


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## gypsysue (Mar 27, 2010)

Back a few pages there was discussion about close families and stretching preps. My kids are like d-saum, in that they can't imagine letting me starve. We're very close and they're good to my husband and I even now. When they visit, they bring food, snacks, drinks, etc. and don't just expect to eat out of our cupboards. They take us out to eat. They check on us and make sure we have everything we need, and we're only in our 50's, not truly elderly yet. Not only are most of them preppers, I've finally convinced them we're serious about giving prep-items to us and to each other for Christmas and birthdays.

We have 9 grandchildren. Regardless of how my kids feel, if the time comes when supplies are short, the GRANDCHILDREN WILL eat. Nothing will go past my lips unless my grandchildren and then their parents have eaten. THEY are the future. My job was to prepare THEM to carry on. If there's enough left for me, fine.

The only hard part is going to be the few that have blown off prepping, and who will show up and take advantage of the money and effort the rest have put into preps. I won't feel bad when their kids eat, but them? Different feeling altogether.


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## d_saum (Jan 17, 2012)

gypsysue said:


> Back a few pages there was discussion about close families and stretching preps. My kids are like d-saum, in that they can't imagine letting me starve. We're very close and they're good to my husband and I even now. When they visit, they bring food, snacks, drinks, etc. and don't just expect to eat out of our cupboards. They take us out to eat. They check on us and make sure we have everything we need, and we're only in our 50's, not truly elderly yet. Not only are most of them preppers, I've finally convinced them we're serious about giving prep-items to us and to each other for Christmas and birthdays.
> 
> We have 9 grandchildren. Regardless of how my kids feel, if the time comes when supplies are short, the GRANDCHILDREN WILL eat. Nothing will go past my lips unless my grandchildren and then their parents have eaten. THEY are the future. My job was to prepare THEM to carry on. If there's enough left for me, fine.
> 
> The only hard part is going to be the few that have blown off prepping, and who will show up and take advantage of the money and effort the rest have put into preps. I won't feel bad when their kids eat, but them? Different feeling altogether.


Well said. :congrat:


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## dnsnthegrdn (Jun 29, 2011)

Sorry that I haven't been able to comment. VERY busy month. We seem to all have "them" to deal with (of course) It's funny, when I mentioned sending money monthly, all of a sudden she was more capable of getting food for herself. Imagine that. Plus I told them they need to make sure they have a storage of gas so they can actually get to me. I told them the senario of power outages and gas stations not working. Her husband was very grateful and said he hadn't thought of that.

Prime example, went to a Kroger gas staton and the lines were down. No use of debit or credit cards, only cash. Which alot of people don't readily have on hand now a days. Everyone was freaking out, pissed off, they didn't know how to deal with it. And that's just one day. Imagine if it went on longer than a day or two and it had been ALL the gas stations. That just reinforced my convictions.

I'm really enjoying all the input.


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## tugboats (Feb 15, 2009)

gypsysue said:


> Back a few pages there was discussion about close families and stretching preps. My kids are like d-saum, in that they can't imagine letting me starve. We're very close and they're good to my husband and I even now. When they visit, they bring food, snacks, drinks, etc. and don't just expect to eat out of our cupboards. They take us out to eat. They check on us and make sure we have everything we need, and we're only in our 50's, not truly elderly yet. Not only are most of them preppers, I've finally convinced them we're serious about giving prep-items to us and to each other for Christmas and birthdays.
> 
> We have 9 grandchildren. Regardless of how my kids feel, if the time comes when supplies are short, the GRANDCHILDREN WILL eat. Nothing will go past my lips unless my grandchildren and then their parents have eaten. THEY are the future. My job was to prepare THEM to carry on. If there's enough left for me, fine.
> 
> The only hard part is going to be the few that have blown off prepping, and who will show up and take advantage of the money and effort the rest have put into preps. I won't feel bad when their kids eat, but them? Different feeling altogether.


Miss Gypsy Sue,

I second your feelings. The only debt I have is to the next generations. I will not have any more offspring. The most important thing to me is the younger ones. My adult children should be able to fend for themselves. If this is not the case then my grandkids will not go hungry because of the short sightedness of thier parents. No child will go hungry as long as I know about them.

I do not want to live in an enviornment where children go hungry and I turn them away. Our young are our future, whether or not we have contributed to thier DNA. My faith will not let me turn the young, feeble, infirm or elderly out into the streets hungry. Many people are concerned only with themselves. There is some merit to this philosophy, but it does not fit in my beliefs.

I will perish by starvation rather than see my offspring or my grandchildren lack nourishment due to selfishness. However, I will feel no guilt telling those that have been warned to prepare (and have laughed at us) to suck swamp water. The young do not know enough, the infirm are unable, the elderly too weak to fend for themselves. My place is to assist those "unable" to tend to themseves. There will be no compassion for the "unwilling".


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## Possumfam (Apr 19, 2011)

surviving said:


> Our plan -- for ANYONE who comes to us hungry after TSHTF -- is to give them a meal and send them on their way with instructions not to come back.
> 
> Peace,
> Sheila


I tend to think that feed 'em once, and like stray cats, they'll be back. You'll have to be very careful.


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## weedygarden (Apr 27, 2011)

*Give them an inch*



Possumfam said:


> I tend to think that feed 'em once, and like stray cats, they'll be back. You'll have to be very careful.


They will want a mile!


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## bahramthered (Mar 10, 2012)

For me it'd be simple adults work for dinner, kids eat free. Make it unpleasant for the adults and they won't be back unless desperate. Make sure your fortified enough that their desperation is suicidal.


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## BillM (Dec 29, 2010)

The Rules

I have provided food for myself , my wife, my children and grand children.

It is here at my residence when they can no longer feed them selves.

Meals will be rationed out here and they will be expected to live here and help with protection and forageing.

If and member wants to feed a friend or a person they feel sorry for, they will be allowed to give them their meal , which they will have to forego.

If my best friend wants to starve me, he isn't a very good friend after all !

The food will be rationed out in amounts that allow us to lose our extra pounds so as not to appear too prosperous .

Hard times , require hard rules . Compassion in hard times should always require a sacrifice.


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## bigpaul (Jun 16, 2012)

nobody knows we have preps and nobody will know we have preps, we keep to the grey man principle and tell no one, not even family.


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## Darto (Oct 24, 2010)

Remember the twilight zone episode where the guy in his own bomb shelter was overrun with neighbors folks trying to get in when the news said an A bomb was on the way? Or something like that. Sort of like what happened in the Noahs ark passage in the Bible. Burt Lancaster made a similar tv special just before he passed away. Both were anti preparedness vehicles.

This is a problem to be considered, and planned for in some way...


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## Kessler (Sep 27, 2011)

tenOC said:


> ...nobody rides for free.


Amen! My wife has a good lookin' girlfriend that has the means, but not the will to do any prepping and said she will come here. The quoted post fits...nobody rides for free.............


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## ashley8072 (Apr 26, 2011)

I've kinda rn into the same problem. Some of my family isn't prepping at all, but with the use of their firearms, it seemed worth it. They shoot all their ammo and if someone were to break in, all they could do is throw guns at them. Lol. I've sat down w them several times and no luck on opening their eyes. To keep from locking the door when they come over, I hid all our supplies and now proceed to tell them that we have nothing and not sure what to do now.


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## weedygarden (Apr 27, 2011)

*How do you respond to "I will come to your house" ?*

Many of you have spilled the beans that you have been storing beans and more and the response has been that the person will come to your house.

How do you respond to that?

Stand there shocked with your mouth open?
Tell them you will not let them in and they need to stay away.
Tell them they will be shot if they show up? (This may be in the plans for some of you, I don't know.)
Tell them to get their behinds in gear and do some prepping.
???


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## Possumfam (Apr 19, 2011)

I say something along these lines:

"Everyone says that, and if they all come, we're all gonna starve. I have enough to feed my own for a little while, but when you cut that in half or tenths, we'll all only make it about a week." All of a sudden, our house doesn't look so good anymore.


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## WatchUr6 (May 18, 2012)

Possumfam said:


> I say something along these lines:
> 
> "Everyone says that, and if they all come, we're all gonna starve. I have enough to feed my own for a little while, but when you cut that in half or tenths, we'll all only make it about a week." All of a sudden, our house doesn't look so good anymore.


Your house might look good for the moment to someone who is desperate. They will then move on to the next place for their next meal. It's better that no one knows about your preps. If they already know, then tell them that you had gone through hard times and that you depleted your supplies and you have nothing left.


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## paguy (Jun 8, 2012)

UncleJoe said:


> Or... tell them they can buy their way in.
> 
> $10,000 down and $5,000 a year until TSHTF.
> 
> That should give you enough money to prepare for them as well.


Holly snikes Unclejoe that is one humdinger of an idea. Too bad they are probably so cheap that they would refuse.


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## paguy (Jun 8, 2012)

After reading more posts with many stating that they would feed them a meal and show them the door I can say this. I believe in charity but, charity starts at home. If a starving person came to my door I would provide a meal to them because it is the right thing to do. At the same time it is a barter system. That first one is free after that they have to produce. It might be an item(s) or provide a service such as make something, fix something, or manual labor. I am a charitable person but do not mistake my kindness for weakness. It is amazing what a hog/gator/shark will eat.....


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## Possumfam (Apr 19, 2011)

WatchUr6 said:


> Your house might look good for the moment to someone who is desperate. They will then move on to the next place for their next meal. It's better that no one knows about your preps. If they already know, then tell them that you had gone through hard times and that you depleted your supplies and you have nothing left.


Only family knows a little about preps (cuz we're trying to get them onboard) and they are half way across the country. The only thing others know is that we garden, hunt, and can our food. Some know that we shop the commissary case lot sales (twice a year) and stock up that way. But if they see your garden and they don't have one themselves, they know you've got a little something, regardless.


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## Halyna (Apr 10, 2012)

I just tell them I won't be home, I'm bugging out


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## LongRider (May 8, 2012)

dnsnthegrdn said:


> It's not like we can drive them away. Anyone else have this problem?


*NOPE !!* We don't run our pie holes about what we have or do not have. That said once it is out of the bag the very first mention on joining us would have them being told to start writing checks. That I am neither their pimp or mother, but I MIGHT be willing pick up their preps on MY time, in MY vehicle, and store it in MY building, on MY property as long as they understand they have to pay their own way AND they understand up front what is MINE is MINE and what was theirs is MINE. My property MY way or the highway. Their choice.


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